Love? Marriage? Is love always enough? Is it love or pity?
Growing up in an African home and wanting to marry for love and not for the finances, might have you looking like an unserious fellow or someone who likes the trenches lol.
Most people believe marriage is a poverty alleviation scheme, it definitely works for some tho, but not for everyone, some end up as punching bags. Its takes someone with zeal and ambition to choose love over money. Its definitely not all about the money at times too, some other factors might affect your choice of a life partner depending on your view about life.
We have heard stories of how a particular individual sponsored the other partner through school and he/she graduates and realizes they deserve better. I won’t even blame such individual, they saw an opportunity and used it. This will definitely have effect on the sponsor/spouse, but this life is a fucking b*t*h and good people have it hard sometimes. Getting married to someone who is doing that out of pity or family pressure, is a life time of torture, if you ask me, O wrong nau…. you are a spec, a rare one at that. We moveeeee regardless.
Back to love and Marriage, the definition of Love can be relative, but we can all agree that love is selfless, attractiveness, sacrifices amongst other things. Marriage on the other hand is a union between two people. Some major factors are responsible for people falling out, after promising each other forever, such factors are:
- Family pressure
- Age difference
- Unresolveable dispute
- One person ready to settle and the other person been indifferent.
The age factor mostly affects the ladies, Our society has been structured in a way that once a lady is approaching her 30s……… and not married then something is wrong somewhere, either she’s been cursed or she’s not a wife material. The big question is ‘Age a yardstick for getting married’? Can’t people be happy without been judged and questioned on when or with whom?
Most times when the lady is ready to settle down and the guy isn’t financially ready, she’s been forced to make some decisions against her will. The guy on the other hand might start doubting love because of this occurrence. Some people will even tell you to go ahead that money will come later, *chuckles in financial danger*, don’t get me wrong o, I am not saying you should get married after building your house or buying your dream Porshe (not a bad idea too) what I am saying is be comfortable enough to afford basic things. Marriage is an eye opener and some people believe crying in a Ferrari is better than crying in a face me I slap you, I don’t kuku blame them, eyes have seen.
Above all, do what works for you. If its money? fine, love? fine, intelligence? fine. As long as you are happy. Also, do not succumb to any society and family pressure, it’s your life and you deserve all the joy and peace that comes with it.